It is a very popular saying that in US, people don't stay with their parents after the age of 18. Of course, may be they are going for higher studies or jobs and they settle in some other places. But it is very rare they go and meet their parents, at least not like how we do in India - weekly once or monthly once. Again, this might be depicting not the majority. But still, I was thinking does this type of living helps us like in taking decisions independently, living life on our own ? Well, there might be a cultural barrier between the west and ours. But which is better ? I think you can never come to a conclusion.
Like for example, in our culture, even after completing the school, choosing the college - weather to go for engineering or medicine or public services - Do we decide them ? How many parents would agree to their children saying, after school, I want to take up modelling as profession or catering as profession ? The reason parents say is from their experience they know what is good and what is bad. Do you think that the guys have a foresight into the industry which they are going to enter. Do we know what and how the computer field is now and how it would grow, when we entered college for pursuing computer science ? Or for that matter, the medical guys or the civil engineers. Well, I would say if they had that idea then why are the confused when coming out of the college searching for IT job ? Is this the mistake of parents who blindly go by the trend existing at that time or the guys who blindly go with their parents ?
Ok, apart from the job, after marriage, how many of the Indian guys n gals are able to lead a life independently ? Without the support of parents ? Very few I hope. Is it because of the way we were brought up ? Does this needs a change ? If yes, in what way ? I would say, part of this is for our good. That, we are always under a shelter. But do we necessarily need to ? What could be the side effects of this ? Questions pile up in front of me. I have seen people who cant say a "NO" to parents even for the essential things and people who cant even talk to their parents - what is supposed to be called as discussion. I think at least this situation should change.
Well, it is not about the parents always. How many kids listen to the words of parents or friends when they point out the mistakes. Man, younger generation hate this very word - "ADVICE". The pendulum swings in both the extremes. There are good parents who always stand as a pillar when kids fall but the next generation always sees this is a headache. May be these kind of people can only learn from their personal experience than hearing it from others. Both the parents and the younger generation should agree to one point - that decisions once taken in life may never have a chance to revert back.
At this time, I would salute the family who are like friends to the children. They are with them all through the life, making sure that their kid makes right decision. Backing up at the right decisions and pointing out the wrong decisions they make. This is the exact kind of situation which the young guys of this age need. Young lads should be made aware of all the pros and cons of whatever decisions they make and this is the important part where parents come into picture.And based on that, the decision should be made. I don't think even in the western culture, parents play the part here, but may be friends or the dear ones help out them.
There are many films in our Indian film industry which constantly revolves around this topic. The best one in Hindi I can think of is - "Fashion" which clearly says how kids who don't get the support, go n make their own decision learns through experience and another epic film in this topic in Tamil is the recent hit - "Abhiyum naanum" where the parents understand their kid's wishes and they stand with them guiding to make their own decisions. I strongly believe that, with this younger generation blooming up now, they understand this demarcation clearly and act promptly to get their family into a good situation.
Ok friends, I think I have written enough. It all started when I was seeing a movie where the hero goes with the word of his dad and never get a chance to "Discuss" with him about this life. It was pretty interesting movie and this made me think backwards as how the current generation stands on this point.
All the best and see you in the next post.
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